fauxstor.net

Kid Robot Extravaganza:
S.F. Artist Huck Gee Gallery Opening
and
One Year Anniversary Party

Kid Robot has featured many talented local artists in its San Francisco store over the past 12 months. This Friday, coinciding with the one-year anniversary of the Haight Street store's opening, Huck Gee's unique character stylings will at last be gracing the walls for a six-week exhibition.

While Huck's urban-erotic character art is rife with Eastern design elements, the lines and contours flow from his days as a San Francisco graffiti artist.

Huck began his career as a British immigrant, fleeing the persecution of graffiti artists in his hometown of Newcastle. Thereafter, he plied his trade as a box car artist in a town with no trains. After being forced to bomb billboards in the SOMA district, he fell in with a group of lockergnomes who enticed him with tales of dragons, ogres, and 24-sided dice.

"I drew a lot of the occult from my D&D days," he recalls. "I would just fill notebooks with trolls and mushrooms." But the phase wouldn't last long. Shortly thereafter, a local punk 'zine described his drawings as "stoner art," and Huck decided that was enough. Rather than go back to urban scrawl, he decided to make a radical departure.

"It was simple, actually. I went to a friend's house. He had a stack of manga, and we were candy-flipping. I mean really frying balls, if you know what I'm saying. My fingers melted into the pages, and ever since I have incorporated that style."

When asked about the pervasive female theme in his art, Huck responded "I went through a long phase of not getting laid, so i had to draw a lot of beautiful women."

The event begins Friday, December 5th at 8:00pm at Kid Robot, 1512 Haight St. (@ Ashbury).

Refreshing adult beverages will be supplied by Yoo-Hoo.

Posted by justin at 12:45 PM | Comments (1)

the blogbook

My lawyer cronies and I recently made public an open community blog that focuses on legal discourse and blogs that address the same. It is called The Blogbook, a homage to our venerable footnote bible from law school days.

It is our hope that people will be interested in contributing to and commenting on the various articles and news pieces made available on the site. (The tone will likely be several thousand levels of sarcasm below what is typically posted here.)

Posted by justin at 7:14 PM

Yellow is the New Black

I installed the handy-dandy "Sesame Street" terror alert level chart from Geek and Proud a few months ago. Recently, I was concerned that it was broken, as it had not changed in quite some time. Since September 25, to be exact: I came to discover the alert level has in fact been at Bert all this time.

And to think, that I had been unaware that I should be feeling something greater than "mild trepidation" (Cookie Monster), and lesser than "I need Atavan now" (Ernie). It is clear that anything below Bert should be eliminated, save Oscar, which we would only need for the Christmas season. And St. Patrick's Day.

The autumnal colors of Yellow and Orange Alert work well with Halloween and Thanksgiving. But come little baby Jesus' birthday, Rummy should alternate between Red and Green, giving us a nice Christmas tree light effect.

It would be a little hard on the nerves, but can you think of a better gesture of masochism to demonstrate that we Americans worship the caucasian, Hyannis Port-sailing God, who beget that swarthy, Aramaic-speaking Jesus fellow? Not that Muslim God, who doubtless wears a turbon and drives a cab, and is merely acquainted with that swarthy, Aramaic-speaking Jesus fellow. But then, that is what the Christmas season is for: to divide people.

But until some USO show comes to Iraq to entertain the troops, who will be compelled to substitute some prancing vixen in a Santa-esque negligee for their wife and kids that they fear never to see again, Joe Army will have no idea it's Xmas time. Why? because it's terror alert level Yellow, while your carcass gets dragged through the streets.

Pardon me, but shouldn't we be at DEFCON 1? That means "Maximum force readiness", right? So, either our troops aren't ready, or they aren't at war. Sorry to our boys who keep getting killed in those rather extensive (and expensive) "training exercises" that we have been carrying out in Iraq and Afghanistan, but they should have been ready.

It seems we should be at DEFCON 1 and Terror Alert Level "Elmo" 24/7 around them thar parts. And here, too. Marshall Law is one of my favorite characters in Tekken. Why wait for some WMD to annihilate the Constitution, as Gen. Franks predicts. Once Bush has wiped his ass with it enough times, there won't be anything left anyway.

Posted by justin at 8:52 AM

Bobby Fisher beats Death at chess

Well, maybe not. But almost as good, Kasparov beat a Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Or a nVIDIA video card. Either way you look at it, chalk one up for humanity. It would be like harnessing the computing power of a Coleco Electronic Quarterback in order to beat me at chess.

Even better, they had "celebrities" like the Houston Tractor Pull Queen and David Caruso make the first move. You know, like "throwing out the first pitch," except where the ball doesn't even make it halfway to the plate.

It reminds me of Homer playing Tic-Tac-Toe against a chicken.

Posted by justin at 6:58 PM | Comments (1)

Arnold Schwarz und Weiss

Day one of Herr Schwarzenneger's reign as Kaiser:

Posted by justin at 6:28 PM

Haris Pilton Tex Sape

Wow. I posted hardly anything this month. Yet, a little bit of nightvision porno reference, and my #1 search string becomes: Paris Hilton Sex tape.

Like I said: google owns you.

Hell, as of today, my page even comes up before Fleshbot.com, and on the day Nick got his puff-piece in the NY Times!

Ya ok, gawker came up sooner, but still.

Posted by justin at 2:04 PM

Paris Hilton Sex Tape

I haven't posted in a while, but just to increase hits, I'll post about nothing, and make the title "Paris Hilton Sex Tape".

Dear person who was actually looking for the Paris Hilton Sex Tape:

Google is manipulating you. It owns you. I own you. Now go out and buy some decent, non-gimmick pr0n.

Or at least read something else here. Don't just click the "back" button. That Paris Hilton swag looks busted-ass anyway.

Posted by justin at 8:40 AM | Comments (2)